Death is the next adventure.

Maria and I started this little blog with the intent of discussing current issues, and while this is certainly a passion of ours, I have to write of my spiritual evolution as well from time to time.

My grandpa lays dying slowly in front of me as I key these words from a smart phone on the hospice wi-fi.  I have been a practicing skeptical agnostic for most of my life, but something is changing.

I am not here to proselytize or preach, because I am still on my own spiritual journey, but Grandpa's steady faith has been hugely inspiring and uplifting to me.  He is serene.  While folks like me have doubts and questions, he is comforted by the knowledge that he is going to meet Jesus, and see his wife of over sixty years in heaven soon.

I have always taken a more esoteric spiritual interpretation of the Bible and its stories.  I figured heaven and hell can be states of mind and ways of being.  Striving to walk the walk of being good not for divine reward but for the natural rewards of practicing love, kindness and empathy always made the most sense to me as a human being. 

"There is no such thing as hell
But you can make it if you try
There might come a day
When emotion can be quantified

But as of now there's no proof necessary, no proof necessary, no proof necessary its only in your mind, your mind, your mind, your mind."

-"Prove It" by Bad Religion

These lyrics summed up my beliefs pretty tidily as an agnostic man.  I never had the heart to fully commit to the atheism of the man I admired most growing up (another story), but I took refuge in science and other rational philosophical ideas detached from the necessity of a creator.

I have come to a crossroads.   I am finding Faith, as my grandparents prayed I would, and it is my own.  Ideas from all that I have read and experienced in my spiritual questing swirl in my head as I attempt to reconcile some sort of unifying thread in my pattern of belief.  Science and spirit.  God(dess) and reason.  The Great Spirit above and behind it all: Creation and its entropic balance, Uncreated.

It is a journey, and I have to practice it every day.

I have a lot to learn, and nothing to preach; I only have one plea--Don't give up hope, no matter how hard things seem.  Every breath brings renewal.  Every day is brand new.  Every moment is an opportunity to grow.

May the one true God bless you all on your journeys through this moment, and all others, no matter who you are.  If you prefer a Mother Goddess to Father God, that is ok too.  It is just imagery.  I have faith that my whole self is known to my Creator, above all silly words my human mouth may spout.  Jesus has helped me, personally, but perhaps if I had been raised in a society with a different prophet (or holy one), then that would be the one I know.  I acknowledge this.  

Therefore I pray your personal journey brings you to the right path up the mountain.  Only you know your path, and my heart is with you, my friend.  Blessings upon you and your spirit.

So be it.

And Grandpa, I love you.